Flawed

Have you ever had a time, where the Lord holds a mirror up to your face and you see your sin in the reflection?  Our God is a loving Daddy-God.  He must make us aware of our sins so that we can make the decision to repent and change.  If we don't ever SEE the sin, then we can't choose to change.  As much as I HATE it when I see my sin in that mirror, I know it's the Lord gently and lovingly reminding me that there is so much more for me, if I will give these things to Him and turn away from them.  His desire is for us to leave sin behind, and if a mess is left because of our actions, He wants us to surrender it all to Him fully, asking Him to help make things right where we have failed.  

Hebrews 12:4-11 - The Message Bible

4-11 In this all-out match against sin, others have suffered far worse than you, to say nothing of what Jesus went through—all that bloodshed! So don’t feel sorry for yourselves. Or have you forgotten how good parents treat children, and that God regards you as his children?

My dear child, don’t shrug off God’s discipline,

    but don’t be crushed by it either.

It’s the child he loves that he disciplines;

    the child he embraces, he also corrects.

God is educating you; that’s why you must never drop out. He’s treating you as dear children. This trouble you’re in isn’t punishment; it’s training, the normal experience of children. Only irresponsible parents leave children to fend for themselves. Would you prefer an irresponsible God? We respect our own parents for training and not spoiling us, so why not embrace God’s training so we can truly live? While we were children, our parents did what seemed best to them. But God is doing what is best for us, training us to live God’s holy best. At the time, discipline isn’t much fun. It always feels like it’s going against the grain. Later, of course, it pays off handsomely, for it’s the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God.

This week, that mirror has gently been held up to my face and I have NOT been happy with the reflection. Lately, I've been hasty in my desire for change, for getting things done; things that I think need to be done quickly, in the ways I think they should be done and in the timeline I desire. The main theme has been "I" or "ME", and when that is our focus, we won't get very far; even if we happen to succeed in that way, we are bound to hurt ourselves or hurt those we love.  We can cause things to be harder than they really have to be, and it just isn't worth it.  Oh, if I would just surrender in the first place and trust God's timing!

My biggest disappointment is when I let down those whom I love (I hate letting anyone down; it's something I hate to do), and because of my actions this week, I'm afraid I did let people down as well as hurt feelings.  I want to be so in-tune with the Holy Spirit, that all of my decisions come most evidently from Him.  I want to slow down my life so that I CAN think more clearly and make better decisions - decisions with less consequences and heartache.

Grace - Oh, how I LOVE Grace!  Seriously, I have learned more about this wonderful word over the last thirteen years, and I am continually amazed by it.  I know, even with my flaws, God's grace flows over me.  He sees Jesus when He sees me, because I've accepted Jesus as my Savior and Lord, and the same is true for ALL Believers.  God doesn't see sin or all of my past flaws and failures . . . He sees a precious child that He has created, in His image, for His glory.  And you know what?  He delights in me!  Even as He holds up that mirror, He gets butterflies looking at me because he loves me that much.  His grace covers all of my sins, so He sweetly shows them to me and encourages me to move on and follow Him instead of my fleeting feelings and desires.  

Grace - 

• unmerited divine assistance given humans for their regeneration or sanctification
•  a virtue coming from God
• a state of sanctification enjoyed through divine grace
• approval, favor
• mercy, pardon
• a special favor; privelege
• disposition to or an act or instance of kindness, courtesy or clemency
• a reprieve

I'm being completely raw here - when I know I have hurt someone or caused disappointment, it causes anxiety.  It's hard for me to stop thinking about how I've failed my friend, what I need to do about it, what I should have done, etc.  This is something God wants to help us with as well.  I have nothing to gain by sharing this part of myself with you today, but I feel led to because there are some of you out there who are just like me when it comes to letting people down.  Or, maybe you deal with anxiety of various kinds (oh, I am there with you all-too-often, when those heart paplatations come out of nowhere).  For some reason, I've experienced a lot of anxiety over the last several weeks, and I'm learning to give it to Him.  I'm learning to give the "what if's" to Him.  I'm choosing to give Him the thoughts of "how can I make it right?" (that plays in my head thousands of times a day).  Even when I don't feel like it, even when I don't FEEL Him, I'm choosing to give my sins, the outcomes from it, and my anxieties to Him.  He WANTS to take it for me and He wants to do the same for you.

Today, a Dear Friend sent me a great article about flaws.  It so moved me that I felt led to share it here. It's important to me that you know, being physically flawed is not the same as being spiritually flawed.  The reason we are flawed spiritually is because of sin and sin separates us from God.  The reason we are flawed physically . . . well, I believe that we won't truly know all of the reasons until we are in Heaven with our Creator, completed and whole.  I DO know that ONE reason God uses flaws is for His glory!  He uses them for OUR GOOD and for HIS GLORY.  He promises that for those who trust in Him.  So, even though we don't know the "why", we can rest assured, knowing that God is using our struggles, our heartaches, our heartbreaks, our "groanings too deep for words", and He is doing something amazing with it all.  He is using them to show the world who He is, and what more could we ask for as a Believer?!  

If you listen to Christian radio, you probably have heard the song, "Flawless" by Mercy Me.  We sing it all the time at our house and it's melodies resonate in Lucy's room on a regular basis.  It's a beautiful song, reminding us that God doesn't see our flaws when He sees us because of the Cross, where He died and paid the price for sin. All seems well and good until you see the music video that comes along with the song.  

Oh, my heart!  I am SO incredibly saddened that people would ever even slightly entertain the thought that something like Down Syndrome would be considered a "flaw" to the Lord.  It angers me to see birth defects (the video shows a woman born without part of her arm) equated with sin, because let me tell you, birth defects are NOT because of sin. Autism is NOT SIN. If we are indeed, "fearfully and wonderfully made", then how in the world could we possibly think that ANYTHING we are born with could be a FLAW?  It's just not true.  And we, as Believers, should know better. Our hearts should be so open to those with disabilities, our lives should be so intertwined with those who have disabilities, that we would never think to compare disabilities with sin OR flaws!  We should so often be putting ourselves into the "shoes" of those who are born differently than us, that we start thinking about them and their comfort and care even BEFORE our OWN comfort and care.  We should be so sensitive to these precious ones that, as followers of Christ, we instinctively see a disabled person as "fearfully and wonderfully made", because that is what we ALL are!  

You see, when God holds that mirror up to us, He indeed lovingly shows us our sins. When God holds up that mirror, He sees NO PHYSICAL FLAWS because we are made in His breathtakingly beautiful image. The beauty of it all, is that God uses BOTH our repented sins and our flaws for His glory and for our good.