"For Unto Us a Child is Born"

WARNING: This Post is one of my longest one's to date.  However, I PROMISE that it is rich, meaningful and has some VERY exciting surprises along the way!  So, read it all at once, read it in small bits, or only read the parts that interest you (I've labeled each section for easier reading).  Also, a big "thank you" to everyone for their patience and understanding as I've been without a working phone and without a working computer at home - yippee (sarcasm)!  

For those reading via phone or tablet - Blogger has seen fit to change the format of this post with extra highlights and confusing paragraph changes; for that, I sincerely apologize.  Hopefully all will be able to read this in it's entirety and hopefully, it will all make some sort of sense (despite the grammatical "differences"). In all seriousness and with all of my heart, I wish you the Merriest of Christmases!

********************************************************

"For Onto Us a Child is Born"

Miss Ellie Kate starring as an Angel 

in the Church Christmas Program 2009

Christmas Songs. They fill our homes, our cars, our churches, and even our shopping malls. I remember one Christmas Season, when Charlie Hall was our Worship Pastor at Bridgeway Church,  he brought to our attention something uniquely special about this season:  Christmas - it's the ONLY season, the only time on earth, where Christ's name is proudly proclaimed out in the public arena, within our communities, throughout the airwaves,  and seemingly everywhere you go. How incredible is it that Our Lord's Name is being sung and proclaimed, even by those who do not know Him?! Do you ever sit back and fully take in the words of these beloved Christmas Carols, understanding the truth coming through the lyrics and rhymes?

Take this popular one, a favorite for many:

Oh holy night! The stars are brightly shining
It is the night of our dear Savior's birth
Long lay the world in sin and error pining
Till He appeared and the soul felt it's worth
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn . . . 

Fall On Your Knees!

Truly He taught us to love one another
His law is love and His gospel is peace
Chains shall He break for the slave is our brother
And in His name all oppression shall cease!
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we
Let all within us praise His holy name!


And one of my VERY favorites, which clearly shows the longing of Advent . . . one I can relate to, with mourning and yearning for My Savior to meet me - not only for Salvation, but for daily life, hope and peace . . . 

O come, O come, Emmanuel
And ransom captive Israel
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appears
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to thee, O Israel.



Advent - many of us celebrate it in our churches and with our families, but what does it truly mean?  The dictionary tells us that "advent" means "waiting or anticipating the arrival of something".  We celebrate Advent in the days leading up to the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ on Christmas Day. It's a holy remembrance of the history of Our People, as Christ-Followers.  It's the marked anticipation our forefathers once knew and so vividly tasted as they lived in a world without a Savior, without the Holy Spirit.  

Man was so sinful - lost and without hope.  Can you imagine - NO light, NO true peace, NO true hope?  They knew He was coming because the Father told them so and spoke to them for generations through the Prophets, as we see in the Bible.  They knew God the Father would bring a King - a King to set them FREE!  They no longer would be slaves or oppressed, as they had been for generation upon generation.

This short video from our church gives an excellent description
of Advent and: The Coming King

The Father fulfilled His promises with the birth of the Baby King. He delivered, quite literally, in fact.  Jesus was born miraculously, from the womb of a humble teenage girl and her partner who was also surrendered to the Father's Will.  Jesus wasn't born in a palace, but in a manger.  You know the story, of course.  It's just so easy to forget the reasoning of it all - Jesus was purposefully born to unknown, unimportant, lowly parents for a reason.  He was born in a lowly town, in a shed with filth and animals all around, without anything that would resemble royalty.  Jesus came to us in the lowliest of earthly forms because He is Us.  Jesus, the King of Heaven and Earth, lowered Himself and became the lowliest of men on that Christmas night. 

Let us not miss the meaning of Jesus's lowly earthly birth and the circumstances around it. 

It's in this spirit which I share what God has so dearly pressed on my heart this Christmas . . . 

• Jesus was fully God and fully man
• THE King, lowered Himself for me, willing to become human on my behalf
• He left His heavenly kingdom and comforts to be a helpless baby in the arms of an imperfect mother and father, to grow in a broken world, just like the one I live in.
• Jesus chose to live in an imperfect world with hurts - physical, emotional, mental and everything in between.  He chose that because of His great love for ME.
• The Father fulfilled ALL of His promises in Christ Jesus!  Even though He came in a different way, and even looked differently, acted and lead  differently than what they thought He would - God's plan was BETTER.  His way was PERFECT, even when it didn't seem that way.  Even when their Long-Awaited, Promised, King and Salvation came in the form of a lowly, poor baby boy without a crown - God was Good and had Good in store for His people, just like He does today.  

Here's something AMAZINGLY EXCITING: For Believers in Jesus Christ, Advent is also the waiting and anticipation of the second coming of Christ. We continue to live in a season of Advent because we know He is once again coming for us, defeating evil, death, and this broken earth once and for all - His Kingdom Come! 

THIS is the reason I have HOPE through My Daughter's death!  Oh, Friend, What else could bring me hope? How else could I go on?  How can one hold their dying child in their arms, kissing her mouth as she takes her last, agonizing breaths?  

There is only one reason why I can keep going; only one reason I have hope: I have hope because I know Jesus came to earth as a precious baby in a broken, human body - leaving His riches and the comforts of Heaven to live on earth among men; living to willingly give Himself as THE sacrifice for all mankind.  

Jesus was born.  Jesus lived.  Jesus died.  Jesus rose from the dead.  

Jesus ascended into heaven.  

JESUS IS COMING AGAIN, reclaiming His  Own, 

and we will live with Him for eternity!

Friends, Death does not bring "eternal sleep".

We won't just "cease to exist" once our hearts stop beating.  

For those who've made Jesus Lord of their life, who have asked forgiveness for their failures and depravity, we can celebrate, continuing a holy state of advent as we await our Precious Savior's return!

********************************************************

A Very Special Delivery

Advent takes on an even more beautiful meaning for the McLaughlin Family this year. You see, the Father, in His most infinite wisdom,  in His most perfect design, has created a little life that will soon join Our Clan.  He has fulfilled His promises to us in more ways than we could have possibly imagined!

This December, this Month of Reckless Love; Our Ellie Kate's month of life and death - it is in this VERY month, where which God has so graciously decided to bless us with a beautiful, newborn Daughter.  

This incredible gift is one we did not seek out, although we did very much hope for it.  God brought her to us and He did it through Ellie Kate.  There are so many intricate details, exciting twists and turns, all gloriously and

completely from the Lord!  We cannot wait to share it with you, when the time is right and when this Little One is finally home and in our arms.  We gleefully expect her arrival any day.

Who but GOD could orchestrate such a thrilling gift?!  

Who but GOD could cause all of these things to fall into order,

at this very time and place?!  

• As we celebrate this Advent, we celebrate the marvelous life of our eldest daughter, Elizabeth Kathleen ('Ellie Kate') McLaughlin, our "Pure and Consecrated" Princess, whom we miss more than the stars in the infinite sky. 

• This Advent Season, we look back on Ellie's last days; on those severely painful, final moments of her precious, earthly life.  Our words fail, and often times so do our bodies, as we continue to face the reality of it all.  Even in joy, even in Advent, a part of us will always mourn.

• This Advent Season, we also celebrate Jesus as the "Giver of All Good Things"!  While no one could ever replace our most cherished, green-eyed, curly-haired little girl; the One born in December, who loved to "hop" around her world, "pat-pat" the ones she loved and dance to any and every beat which filled the air . . . God has given us the gift of LIFE in the form of another Little Soul, and the hope of her is a healing balm to us all.  

• This Advent Season, we celebrate that Christ has come to earth and that Christ will come again!  And in between those miraculous things, we can walk in full assurance that He is FOR us, that He is WITH us, Emmanuel.  

****************************************************************************

Month of Reckless Love

This year we adopted the Williams family, made up of mom, daughter (14) and son (8).  Dad is currently in prison and has been for several years.  I had to force the family to choose "wants" and wishes for the Amazon List,as all they really wanted to put down were things such as shoes, socks and underwear.  This family is humble and precious, and they've become very dear to our hearts. Oh, what a joy it has been to see the wishes, needs and wants of this adopted family fulfilled!

IMPORTANT ADDITION:  We've recently  added one teenage girl to the family Wish List. "K" is a 16 year old girl now living with the Williams family, as her father was recently released from prison and is currently unable to assist in any way.  "K"s biological mother is currently unwilling and unable to care for several of her children, including K (who is the eldest). 

 " K" was given the role of raising her younger brothers and sisters while in her mother's home, and she misses her siblings terribly.  Although she doesn't ever want to live in that household again,   "K" does long to talk to her siblings and check on their well-being. Because of this, her Christmas wish consists of a flip phone, or a type of phone she can easily and cheaply communicate with.  "K" doesn't have a job because she is in school full-time and that is tough enough doing on your own, especially without any support from your family.

This Sweet Teen needs clothes mostly, and undergarments and other personal items that a teenage girl might need and want.  Gift cards are the best present for "K" or you can CLICK HERE for her Amazon Wish List.  

Even though the Amazon Wish Lists are almost complete, you can still send gifts to our address - gift cards to grocery stores, gift cards to the mall (the ladies need bras and undergarments), even monetary gifts and pantry items are welcome!  All donations will go directly to the family and to their physical needs.  So far, we've had a couch donated, as well as new mattresses for every one in the family (they currently sleep on the floor or on an old mattress on the floor).  A beautiful bed frame has also been donated and we hope to have new bedding for the family as well, including sheets!  

Can you believe how amazing God is - to move in the hearts of YOU on behalf of this family?!  Because of YOU, they are seeing the Body of Christ, the Love of Christ, the acceptance of Christ, the provision of Christ, and SO MUCH MORE!  

*Please, if you have any questions at all concerning our adopted family this year, or if you have items you might like to donate, feel free to contact me via Facebook or email: tullyryan@hotmail.com.

******************************************************

"Ellie Kate's Wish"

(Ellie Kate's Helping Hands through NKH Crusaders)

This special fund through NKH Crusaders has been a tremendous blessing to people all over the United States! Several families were nominated by their fellow NKH families and as of this moment,  all but ONE gift has been purchased AND delivered!   From medical needs, such as a bath chair and a special humidifier, to basic toys - all items were things the nominated family  struggled to provide for various reasons. Because of YOU and your generosity, these needs and wants have been fulfilled.  

Click HERE to see last NKH gift left to fill

In addition to needs being met, a very giving Sunday School class at Emmaus Baptist Church of Moore, most generously blessed one of our dearest NKH Families, providing both needs  AND  wants! I wish we could all see the look on that little girl's face when she opens 

that American Girl Doll on Christmas morning - the doll that looks like HER; the doll she's wanted for years, but all her family's extra funds are needed for her brothers, both of whom have NKH.

*If you still feel led to give to an NKH Family this Christmas or to NKH Crusaders on behalf of Ellie Kate or Lucy, please glance at the information included at the end of this incredibly long post;).

******************************************************

THANK YOU

OHMYGOODNESS, my heart dances at the thought of all the JOY and HAPPINESS brought about by so many of you, and all in Ellie Kate's honor! 

Friends, We are truly, eternally grateful!

 I have NO doubt Miss Ellie Kate's green eyes are sparkling  as that dazzling, sly grin sweeps across her face, those luxurious brown curls, bouncing up and down, as her deep giggle radiates throughout the heavens - her heart full of delight, peace and cheer; her soul so full of gratitude that it shines from her perfect, heavenly Being.  

And one day - One day, Ellie Kate will 

thank you for recklessly loving the World in her honor. 

One day, you will hear her voice,

as she so merrily dances and shouts in gratitude,

for all that you have done to serve, to sacrifice, to honor, 

to recklessly love, 

. . . the Least of These.  

Matthew 25:40

New International Version
"The King will reply, 'Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.'

*********************************************************************

*****************************************************************

Many sweet friends have asked about end-of-year giving, so with that in mind, we share the following information (simply click on the links below):

• NKH Crusaders - Supporting Research - funds donated go solely toward NKH research at the University of Colorado and Denver Children's Hospital, or the research efforts at Notre Dame University, and/or the new research efforts at Boston Children's Hospital
• OKC Hope Link - the 501c3 God led us to start in 2007,  ministering to families whose children suffer from rare, serious and undiagnosed disorders / outreach to families who have lost children due to disease or illness
• McLaughlin Family Medical Fund - through Helping Hands Ministries, a 501c3 which pays medical bills directly or reiumburses via medical receipt (seen under 'Ellie Kate Memorial Fund').

Grateful Hearts and a God who is Faithful and True

Precious Friends, December is now upon us, and it hardly seems possible that Ellie Kate's ELEVENTH birthday is this Sunday!  It is now officially, "Ellie Kate's Month of Reckless Love" and in honor of our "reckless love" efforts this month, we invite you to change your Facebook profile to one of the pictures below to help us spread the word!

First off, I want to thank you for the many ways you've already loved and served the specific families God has led us to focus on this year. It's just the beginning of December and already, we've had packages come to our door, "In Honor of Ellie Kate"!  I will never tire of seeing her name on the packages YOU have provided for others.  Our entire family giggles and jumps up and down when we open the packages each night, looking to see what the Lord has brought to the families we're collectively giving to!  I could never fully convey our gratefulness, but please know that you honor us and honor Ellie Kate when you give, serve, provide for, and pray for these particular families.  

Christmas Gifts for Families!

Secondly, I want to apologize for my tone in the last blog entry.  Friends, you got to see the real and raw feelings of a mourning momma, that's for sure.  Here's the thing though, in those moments, in that situation, I wasn't giving this all up to the Lord.  I wasn't giving HIM control of this all-important-month and because of that, I was more down and defeated than I needed to be!  When I last wrote, it wasn't yet December and I was already worried that gifts wouldn't be purchased and that these families would be left without their needs or wishes granted . .  . Oh ME of little faith! God told us to dedicate the month of December in this way and this year, He has once again shown us what and who to focus the "Reckless Love" upon.  Oh, Friends!  THE most important thing I have learned in these (almost) four years since losing Ellie Kate from this life, is that GOD IS FAITHFUL AND TRUE.  We are following His direction and He will see it through - no matter how many participate, HE will provide and HE will get the glory.  That's what this life is all about.


A little Scriptural Truth to show God's Character as Faithful and True 

Psalm 78:35
And they remembered that God was their rock, And the Most High God their Redeemer.
Proverbs 23:11
For their Redeemer is strong; He will plead their case . . . 
Psalm 33:4
For the word of the LORD holds true, and we can trust everything he does.
Revelation 19:11
I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called Faithful and True. With justice he judges and wages war.

  

Reckless Love (the Mike and Ryan definition): 

Reckless Love is taking intentional action in order to benefit the life of another 

without worrying about the consequences. 

Through this roller-coaster ride has allowed our family to be enveloped by the special needs world, along with the world of child-loss, and those who are medically fragile.  God has taught us so many precious things.  After all, He does not cause or allow things to happen without a purpose.  Through Sweet Ellie Kate's life and all we've lived through, all we've experienced; through the intimate ways the Body of Christ has surrounded us, we have learned more about reckless love than we ever knew was possible!  In the past four years specifically, we've learned more about ourselves, our marriage, our living children; we've learned more about the beautiful Body of Christ, at work in their own giftings, even when hasn't been convenient, even when it's meant sacrificing, even when we've let them down . . . The Body has stayed with us through the eleven years of this journey, all because of the reckless love of Christ.  It's simply the only explanation of why someone, who brought us meals in December 2005, still brings us meals in December 2016 - It's because of the works of Father, Son and Holy Spirit within the hearts of man, not because of anything good man has done, but solely because God created us and loves us! 

We long for the world around us to see, taste and feel this same reckless love, and the month of December, the month of Ellie's birth and the month of her death, is the time we've dedicated and invited those around us to participate in acts of service, sacrifice and love.  Specifically, we ask that you take part in providing for the following families which the Lord has laid on our hearts.  You can do just that by clicking on one of the following lists in BLUE, by providing something that is listed, or even something God has laid on your heart to give. 

Christmas Family Adoption 2016

 The Williams Family, whom we've adopted this year for Christmas is in great need of almost everything, as they hardly have any possessions of their own. They are in need of everything from jeans to blankets, from home decorations to pantry items.

Our Adoption Family is made up of Mom, her teenage daughter (14), a son (8), 
as well as a 16 yo girl who is living with them, due to abandonment.  The Amazon gifts will be mailed to our home and we will get them to the family in time for Christmas (mom wants to wrap some gifts herself so we are providing wrapping materials as well).  

 Remember, both the Amazon Wish List and Wish List for 16 yo Girl give you great ideas, but you do NOT have to order only from Amazon.  You can purchase these items, or even similar items! 
We ask only that you get all items to us by December 18th, 
in order for them to be wrapped and delivered in time for Christmas Morning.

Feel free to spread the word about this specific Christmas Adoption -
You never know what the Lord might lead an individual or Community Group, Life Group,  Sunday School class, or even one individual to give this Christmas season!!! 

SIZES:

Mom - Shirt L, Pants/Jeans 10-12 long, Shoes 9

Daughter 14yo - Shirt L, Pants/Jeans 14 long, Shoes 9

Son 8yo - Shirt - kids M, Pants/Jeans M (size 8-10), Shoes 3.5

Teen Girl (16yo teen who lives with the family/father is in prison and mom has essentially abandoned her) - Shirt S/M, Pants/Jeans 0-3, Shoes 6.5; Favorite Color - Red
*This sweet girl needs new underwear, socks, bras, clothes (new and used), coat (new or used), toiletries, and her main wish: a cell phone to stay in contact with her brothers and sisters.  Wish List for 16 yo Girl

GIFT IDEAS: 

Laundry detergent, quarters for laundry (at their apartments), Walmart gift cards for groceries and necessities, JC Penney gift cards for clothes (mom and daughter need new bras), pantry items.  The Williams Family is also in great need of a car (they currently do not have one). 

***********************************************

"Ellie's Wish" for fellow NKH Families from around the World

As part of the Ellie Kate Wish Fund through NKH Crusaders (which is the main organization supporting NKH families as well as NKH research around the world), these special Amazon Wish Lists were created specifically by individual NKH families.  These particular families were chosen because of their involvement within the NKH Community and because of the needs 
of their special needs/medically fragile children and other "typical/healthy" children as well 
(siblings often feel left out as so much attention has to be given to the child who is sick).

Gifts include items not covered by insurance as well as 
special Christmas gifts for NKH children and their siblings.  

Would you please consider purchasing an item off one of our NKH Family's Wish Lists (click on the link below to see each Amazon Wish List)?  
Each item will be directly mailed to the proper family.  

NKH Family 1
NKH Family1 (cont'd)

NKH Family 2

NKH Family 3

NKH Family 4

God is so good to change my heart and perspective over the last few days.  That doesn't mean I am not hurting physically, mentally and emotionally.  It doesn't mean we are pretending that all is okay, ignoring our feelings and thoughts of Ellie Kate's birthdays and parties in the past.  It just means for now, in this moment, I've been able to give it all to the Father.  He gives me immense joy in knowing other people will be greatly blessed in His name and in Ellie's honor this year.  

If you are holding tight to heartache or bitterness like I was in my last post; if you are struggling in only seeing the bad or can't seem to stop wallowing in your current situations, try sincerely praying and giving it all to the Father.  There are no magic words or rhymes - just a humble spirit, crying out to God for help.  He hears you.  He knows you.  He loves you (no matter what, always and forever).  God IS faithful and true and He can unveil that truth to you now.  Believe me - even if it's a constant struggle to continue to give it over to God and to put it in His hands, it's worth it.  Leaving your problems in HIS hands and out of YOURS brings supernatural, sweet freedom and I am hoping you can find that even now!  

Sweet Freedom!

Bad Dreams, Disappointment and Ellie Kate's Month of Reckless Love

This week, I had a beautiful dream but first, let me fill you in on a few key things so you can really get the jest of it all . . . 

As you may know, to celebrate Ellie Kate's home-going the past three years, we've created Amazon Wish Lists full of books, games and toys for patients who were staying at OU Children's Hospital.  YOU would purchase items directly from the Amazon Wish Lists,and those items were sent directly to our home.  Mike and I would hand-delivered those gifts to patients at OU on December 4th, Ellie Kate's birthday.  After all, Sister Sue spent that last birthday inpatient, where we had a simple little party for her in one of the waiting rooms.  That place, those halls, those rooms are sacred to us and it has been a JOY and delight to hand out gifts to patients while sharing Ellie Kate's story and legacy of Reckless Love; a legacy we want to live out for the rest of our lives. 

Hopefully you've heard that God wanted us to do something different this year. He clearly told us to adopt a small family as part of celebrating Ellie's Month, with the idea of us all coming together in honor of EK, loving, serving and providing for this little family.  The Father literally gave us the perfect family, who's needs are great.  God has also told us to provide for fellow NKH Families around the world,  affected by the same rare and terminal genetic disorder as we are.  We've been led to partner with NKH Crusaders to further "Ellie Kate's Helping Hands", providing wishes of both needs and wants this Christmas.  

So, now that we're all on the same page, let's continue with 

that beautiful dream the Spirit gave to me . . . 

THIS DREAM:  You know the kind, when it's so real you could hear, touch and smell during it's entirety; where you wake up bursting with JOY, grateful for God's faithfulness?! 

Oh Friends, I do so hope you've experienced this in your lifetime!  

In this particular dream, I FELT God's faithfulness, goodness and provision. I was closely watching the Amazon Wish Lists for Ellie Kate's Month of Reckless Love.  In this vivid dream, I literally saw the list for the family we've asked you to join us in adopting this Christmas. I also physically saw the NKH Christmas Wish Lists through NKH Crusaders.

At first in my dream, I saw the Amazon Wish Lists, with the many pictures of items these Sweet Families so desperately need, along with a few little items they want.  Big tears filled my eyes as I realized NONE of the gifts had been purchased and Christmas was almost here! The dreamy tears  flowed and turned into dreamy SOBS.

Out of nowhere, it was as if the Father sweetly lifted my face with His finger.  He had been standing there, looking at the lists with me the entire time and all of a sudden, in some ultra-speedy way, people started purchasing the gifts from the lists!  "PURCHASED!" popped up over and over and over again, and Mike and I were filled with JOY and excitement!

In my dream, I kept praising and thanking God for His provision, for clearly stepping in and fulfilling the needs of families HE alone laid on our hearts.  I praised Him for allowing us to physically SEE His provision, knowing EVERY wish had been granted, knowing EVERY need had been met, knowing EVERY gift would be delivered in time for Christmas morning.  In the dream, I worshiped God as Jehovah Jireh, "the God who provides", and that's when I awoke, still filled with JOY and THANKSGIVING!

Yesterday (Thanksgiving Day), I excitedly looked 
at those same Amazon Wish Lists and I was shocked.  

My dream was coming true - when looking at the lists,  

I saw NOTHING has been purchased off of ANY of our lists. 

Unfortunately, I realize I haven't posted or promoted our lists like I have in past years. Even so, I am terribly disheartened, and being raw with you, I'm sick to my stomach thinking about our Adoptive Christmas Family and our fellow NKH Families, for at this point, NONE will receive the items they need, nor the items they long for this year. 

At this time, our families will not have a single present under the tree in honor of Ellie Kate's Month of Reckless Love, and the mere thought of that breaks my heart into a million pieces.  

Questions flood my mind . . . 

• What have Mike and I done wrong to make it so no one has participated so far? In years's past, most wish lists have been filled and sent to our home for wrapping by this time! 
• Did changing our giving "focus" for the Month of Reckless Love bring too much confusion? Instead of handing out gifts to patients at Children's Hospital, we've clearly felt led to provide Christmas (wants and needs) to a precious, local family in need.  We've also decided to support our fellow NKH families in need, filling their wishes for the "Ellie Kate Helping Hands Project" through NKH Crusaders.  We know God told us to do this, but where is His faithful proof?
• Has it been too long now since Ellie died? Have people just simply, innocently, forgotten about Ellie Kate and The Month of Reckless Love we do in her honor?  It has been four years this December 23rd, and it's completely understandable if people forget, or no longer feel the urgency in supporting these efforts which to us, keep Ellie Kate's name and legacy alive.

As I said, this December 23rd marks FOUR YEARS since Ellie Kate's passing.  FOUR YEARS since I last held her, since I last felt her heartbeat or kissed those gorgeous, pink, full lips and those sweet little earlobes.  To us, it's like yesterday and at moments, like a lifetime ago.  I have learned to never, ever expect people to really "get it".  I don't expect people to understand or remember the anniversaries, birthdays or hard days such as holidays, family celebrations.  Only those who've truly lost a child of their own, whom they've raised, birthed, then buried - only they can bear witness to the type of pain, heartache;  the waves of grief we've tasted too frequently.  Only they know the sleepless nights (like Thanksgiving Night for me), the grief-sickness, and everything in-between.

The holidays are especially rough as you see those close to you happy, continuing to make memories with those they love; you realize again that there are no more memories to be made with your child. There's a sting when walking by that section of clothes where you used to shop for your daughter.  No more Christmas wish lists for him or for her.  There won't be any presents for them  at the Family Holiday Gathering, and why should there be?  They are gone, but the feelings can be ever-so-tender.

This is when the dagger-thoughts start creeping in, "Do they even realize she's gone from the Kid Table? That there's one less place setting again this year?".  "Do my parents, my brothers and sisters, even the cousins - do they remember his/her laugh and mannerisms?".  We often wonder, especially during the holidays, "Will anyone say her name? Will they share a memory (esp without me having to instigate it)?" or maybe, "When we go around the table saying what we are thankful for, will anyone mention My Child?  Or has it simply been too long for everyone else but us?".

It's during this most difficult time that our family needs encouragement from the Body of Christ - from our friends and family around the world.  Is it selfish to shout your needs to the world? Well, I believe the Lord wants me to share my needs and brokenness with you and with those around me, because He wants others to see Christians (true followers of Christ) hurt, mourn and question during life's most tragic times, just like any other human do.  The Body of Christ is called to share each other's burdens and most of the time, I won't know your burden unless you share it with me.  It's what we're called to do; it's in our nature, in our calling as Followers of Christ. Jesus called His Disciples to sell all they had to give away so that they could FULLY follow Him.  He gave them mandates to love, serve and give to the hurting, the widowed, the poor (physically poor and poor in spirit), and the same is true today. Friends, because of the Holy Spirit, we are fully capable of loving these same ways! 

I wish I could explain how important it is to our family that Ellie Kate is remembered, that her legacy continues through others who've known Ellie Kate personally; by those who have known OF and ABOUT EK  and by those who've known and experienced reckless love 

because of her precious life!

Dear Friends, thank you for sticking with me this far on this post.  Let me wrap it all up here below and although I know it isn't a spotless package wrapped perfectly and without flaw, I DO invite you to still open it, to still take part!  

Read here until the very end and click on the links 

to see how you can give, what you can give and who you can give to.  

Christmas Family Adoption 2016

 Our Christmas adopted family  is in great need of almost everything, as they hardly have any possessions of their own. They sleep on beaten-up mattresses, laying directly on the floor.  Their furniture (given to them or taken from out of dumpsters) has holes from cigarette burns and are covered in stains.  They sleep with little blankets and mom wears the same pair of jeans each day.  All three family members share a little flip phone, even though the daughter is in high school and the son is in 2nd grade.  They also do not have a car or computer.   

Although momma especially is incredibly clean and keeps their little home immaculate, she can only use the washer and dryer at the apartment complex.  This only happens when they have detergent and quarters to pay for the machines.  Father/husband is out of the picture and isn't responsible for any financial help at this time (he physically is unable to assist for the foreseeable future).  

Our Adoption Family is just Mom, her teenage daughter and their little son, desperately trying to figure out how to survive, how to find a job while not having a car to get to and from work, etc.  

Would you please consider purchasing an item off of the Adopted Family's Amazon Wish List? 
(click on the link above to see the family's lists) 

 Remember, this Amazon Wish List gives you great ideas (and sizes too), but you do NOT have to order only from Amazon.  You can purchase these items, or even similar items!  There are items from all price-ranges, too!  It was difficult to get the family to list items other than just socks, underwear and groceries, which is further proof of how humble and genuine they truly are.  I had to prod and poke them to choose things for an Amazon Wish List, and I encouraged them to "go big" and put a few extravagant wishes on the lists as well.  You never know what the Lord might lead an individual or Community Group, Life Group, Small Group, Sunday School class, Church, or even one individual to give this Christmas season!!! 

***********************************************

"Ellie's Wish" for fellow NKH Families from around the World

As part of the Ellie Kate Helping Hands Fund through NKH Crusaders (which is the main organization supporting NKH families as well as NKH research around the world), these special Amazon Wish Lists were created specifically for individual NKH families.  These particular families were chosen because of their background within the NKH Community and because 

of the needs their children with NKH have at this time.

  Families were encouraged to choose items that would bless them this Christmas - gifts for their special AND typical children, as well as needs for their disabled child(ren), 

which aren't currently covered by insurance.  

Would you please consider purchasing an item off one of our NKH Family's Wish Lists (click on the link below to see each Amazon Wish List)?

NKH Family 1

NKH Family 2

NKH Family 3

NKH Family 4

God truly IS faithful and I BELIEVE He WILL fulfill each and every one of these lists!  I believe He will meet the needs of these precious people whom He has laid on our hearts, whom He has told us to share with you.  I believe the dream He gave me will come true, and ALL of us will see the Father at work as Jehovah Jireh, the God Who Provides!  

Thank you for taking part of this most important time of year for us; for remembering Our Daughter and through that, breathing life into our hearts once again.  There are many other good and happy things happening and we cannot wait to share them with you!  We will do so very soon, especially since the gifts will start coming in and our hearts will be at peace, knowing you remember and care!

With Gratefulness, Expectation and Love,

Ryan

The Month of Reckless Love - Join us in the Celebration!

Oh, My Friends!  You precious people who have followed our story from the beginning (December 2005), those who've jumped in along the way, and those who are brand new to Our Journey in this life of special-needs and medical fragility . . . each of you, ALL of you, just simply MUST KNOW that having you by our side has helped us to get through it all.

It's been difficult this year, in particular, to force myself to sit and write about this upcoming celebration of Ellie Kate's life and the Month of Reckless Love.  OH, how I long to celebrate Our Daughter with you!  And OH, how our hearts continue to hear the call to recklessly love the world around us, calling others to do the same! And yet, grief seeps in, sweeps in, roars in at times - even when you don't want it to.  We will be marking four years without Ellie Kate.  We will be celebrating what would be Ellie's 11th birthday.  My fears this Season are real - since it's been so long, I'm afraid we won't have people commit to these special projects, even though they still love us.  It's so easy to move on with life, and natural to do so.  For us though, life is changed forever and it will never go back to "normal" again.

To us, this Celebration isn't "just" an event or a mere call to action.. This is a life-marker for us, each and every year.  It's our Ebenezer ( ‘Thus far the Lord has helped us’ 1 Samuel 7:12). and with each year, we add a stone representing the outpouring of love specifically shown because of Ellie Kate. With all of this in mind, you can imagine just how important these efforts of reckless love are to us!

For Ellie Kate's Month of Reckless Love this year, we will be doing the following:  

1. Williams Family Christmas Adoption - This is a precious family we have come to know well and they are very dear to our hearts.  The family's needs are great and we had to really push them to list things other than groceries, socks and underwear on their Christmas Wish Lists.

You can provide for the Williams Family in the following ways: 

• Purchase something directly from the Williams Amazon Wish List - the item will be mailed to our home where we will wrap them and give them to the family
• Purchase items similar to those on the Amazon Wish List (the family is NOT particular about where their gifts come from), then contact me directly about wrapping and pick-up plans
• Clothing items for each family member:
• Mom - size Large, mediums, size 9 shoe
• 14yo Daughter - size large, mediums, size 9 shoe
• Give other items needed by the family: 
• grocery gift cards (Walmart)
• car (they currently have no vehicle)
• job for momma (she is currently out of work, but wants to!)
• basic pantry items and toiletries
• furniture - mattresses are currently on the floor, and there are no dressers for their belongings
• laptop or computer for the 14yo daughter that she can use for school (can be new or used)
• Gift Card Ideas - Hot Topic, Ross, KMart, Shawnee Mall, fast food 

2. "Ellie's Wish" through NKH Crusaders - this special fund set up in Ellie Kate's name, is solely purposed to bless and serve fellow NKH families around the world.  With the help of many of YOU, we recently held a table auction for this fund at the NKH Crusaders Fundraiser in Boston.  Because of some great donations, we were able to do a small Facebook auction to raise money for this as well.  

Since we have not met our goal of $2,000 for Ellie's Wish, we have set up an Amazon list full of needed and requested items from our approved NKH families.  This list allows you to directly mail your item to our NKH family members around the world . . . 

• NKH Family 1:Amazon Wish List 1
• NKH Family 2: Amazon List 2
• NKH Family 3: Amazon Wish List 3
• NKH Family 4:  Amazon Wish List 4

We ask that  all gifts be purchased no later than December 18th

3.  December 4th - Ellie Kate's Birthday; help us celebrate in one of the following ways:

• Tell someone about Ellie Kate - tell them her story 
• Tangibly love someone around you who has a disability OR who has a child with a disability.  If you feel comfortable, tell the recipient about your friend, Ellie Kate.
• Tangibly love someone around you who recently lost a loved one OR who has a loved one who is medically fragile/critically ill.  If you feel comfortable, tell the recipient about your friend, Ellie Kate.  

4.  December 23rd - Ellie Kate's Heaven Day: 

• Join us in releasing balloons in Ellie Kate's honor, anytime and anywhere.  
• If possible, take a photo of your balloon release and share it on social media

Facebook Auction Taking Place NOW - November 4, 2016!

FACEBOOK AUCTION!!!! The following items are being auctioned off for the Ellie Kate Helping Hands and Wishes Fund through NKH Crusaders. All monies raised go directly to this special fund whose purpose is to support fellow NKH families. Our goal is to raise $2000 in order to help our NKH friends, all in Ellie Kate's memory and honor!! Please help us by bidding on these fabulous items. Winners will be contacted by midnight tonight (Friday, November 4, 2016).


All you need to do is go to FACEBOOK, find me under "Ryan Elizabeth McLaughlin", and bid on some items!  Simply post bids in the comments below each item.  If you are out of state, we will mail items directly to you.  

We are incredibly grateful to the individuals who donated items so that this auction could take place.  A BIG THANKS to YOU for supporting our fellow NKH Families while also honoring our Ellie Kate!  

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year - In Honor of Ellie Kate

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year - In Honor of Ellie Kate

You've seen the decorations in stores and ads on TV, and your children are already giving you their lists. You might even be thinking of getting that tree down from the attic in this mild November weather.  You know what all of this points to, don't you?  It's not "just" Christmas, although that is approaching faster than I would like!  It's almost DECEMBER, and with December comes, "In Honor of Ellie Kate - A Month of Reckless Love"!  THIS is OUR favorite, most WONDERFUL time of year!  

As many of you know, our gorgeous eldest Daughter, Ellie Kate was born December 4, 2005 and she took her last breath on earth December 23, 2012.  Ellie Kate was born with a rare and terminal genetic disorder, the same disorder that Lucy Belle has.  This disorder causes Our Girls to essentially make too much glycine within their little bodies.  The effects are extremely damaging and deadly.
There are less than 600 people living in the world today with NKH.  Most children die within the first few months, but we had SEVEN, GLORIOUS YEARS with our EK!

Ellie Kate ROCKED OUR WORLD, and in a GOOD way.  It's through Ellie Kate's life that the Lord gave us a mission as a family - to love and serve fellow special needs and medically-fragile families just like ourselves.  Through Ellie Kate, we also learned how to recklessly love others, including our Daughter who could not walk, talk, hug or show many signs of true affection..  Now, this is very much a "Mike and Ryan"-type of word and definition, but we stand by it and agree with it 100% . . .

• "Love" should be a verb, an action; it's not just a feeling, because our feelings pass and fail us.  

• "Reckless" means to be unconcerned with the consequences of an action; to test the limits and not worry about what might happen, be it good or bad. 

Reckless Love is taking intentional action in order to benefit the life of another without worrying about the consequences. 

For the past three years, at the beginning of November, I have posted an Amazon Wish List in order to collect specific books and toys for children inpatient at OU Children's Hospital during the holidays. Those who felt led would look at the list and purchase items that would in turn, would be given to patients at OU Children's. This has been a precious tradition and we've proudly passed out gifts for three years now, all because of YOU and your overwhelming generosity!  

This year, the Lord has laid something completely different on our hearts and we hope you will be equally as excited and involved as you have been with our efforts in the past!  

This year, our Reckless Love Challenges will include the following:

1.Grant wishes for fellow NKH Families - We have a special Amazon Wish List dedicated to "NKH Families called, "Ellie Kate's Wish"

NKH Crusaders has created a special fund in Ellie Kate's name.  Through this fund, fellow NKH families are encouraged to submit needs such as medical equipment, medical bills, and other things that may lessen the burden of the family.  These needed items will be posted on the Wish List for you to help provide. 

2. Family Christmas Adoption - An Amazon Wish List will be dedicated to the Williams Family from Shawnee.  This list will include "needs" of the family as well as a few "wants".  Their needs however, go way beyond that of an Amazon Wish List . . . 

This small family  has become very dear to us and they are in great need.  Dad isn't in the picture at the moment, so it's just momma and her two children.  Mom needs a job and is looking for one at the moment.  They do not have a car.  They do not have bed-frames (their beds lay on the ground).  They do not have proper furniture in their home and many times do not have money for groceries and bills. Our desire is for this momma and her kids will get to TASTE and SEE that the Lord is good and that He will provide for their every need.  It's exciting because you and I can be a part of that this year!  

3.  Hope Link Christmas Adoption - There will be an Amazon Wish List dedicated to a precious family within our Hope Link support group.  This list will include "wants" and "needs" as well with the main goal being that we meet those major needs.  We will be "adopting" this family alongside of OKC Hope Link, the non-profit Mike and I helped to start in Ellie Kate's name.  This particular family has three children with disabilities and medical needs.  We want to show them that Jesus cares about the tiniest details in their life!  

So, you have a few questions . . . 

• Why am I posting info on this special event  at the beginning of November? Posting now gives you enough time to look at the Amazon Wish Lists and purchase items. It gives time for the gifts to be mailed and gives time to beautifully wrap and deliver each and every gift.  
• Once I purchase a gift online, where does it go?  Each Amazon Wish List will be different. 
• Items purchased for the NKH Families will be mailed to Boston and then on to their specific family.  
• Items purchased for the Adopted family in Shawnee will come directly to our home where they will be wrapped by a group, of lovely ladies and delivered by hand
• Items purchased for the Hope Link family will also come directly to our home, where they will be wrapped by a group of lovely ladies, then delivered by hand to the family
• Can I get a tax-write off from this purchase/donation?  Yes! This IS possible if you do so through Amazon Smile (check our their site for more info).  

One Last Important Thing . . . 

Whenever you order from Amazon, be sure to do so from Amazon Smile!  By doing so, you are giving a small portion of your gift to the OKC Hope Link Foundation.  Those small gifts do add up, so please take the time to purchase your items in this way - even make it your habit from now on! 

About AmazonSmile

"AmazonSmile is a website operated by Amazon with the same products, prices, and shopping features as Amazon.com. The difference is that when you shop on AmazonSmile, the AmazonSmile Foundation will donate 0.5% of the purchase price of eligible products to the charitable organization of your choice.

Every item available for purchase on www.amazon.com is also available on AmazonSmile (smile.amazon.com) at the same price. You will see eligible products marked "Eligible for AmazonSmile donation" on their product detail pages".

December is a month we look forward to because we celebrate Ellie Kate with those around us and for a time, we hear her name more often and see her name in print.  It's a beautiful thing to us as parents, and we give the Lord ALL the glory for what has been done through this in the past three years and we ask Him to richly bless our efforts this year as well!  In the days to come, I will be posting more information on this special time of the year, giving you ideas on how to love those around you in recklessly loving ways, while also honoring Ellie Kate. More details to come later this week!  

Thank you for praying about how God would have you participate in this year's Month of Reckless Love.  

This Week, This Week, This CRAZY Week . . .

It's only Monday, right?  Even so, it has already been a crazy week!  

Mike and I spent part of the day at the OU ER with Lu Lu. She has a royal, giant bump on her head and we are told to expect TWO black eyes from it:(. Lucy pulled a tray down onto herself (which she loves to do, but we try to not let her do); I wasn't in the room, thus the accident happened.

Lucy also has C-Diff, which she's contracted bc of the four different antibiotics we've tried/used to clear up her awful double ear infections. Now her bottom is on fire while almost constantly "leaking" and her little ears aren't cleared up at all (remember when I told the ENT I wanted to do rocephin shots in the VERY beginning but he didn't think it was necessary? This ALL could have been - maybe - avoided if he had just listened to this experienced mommy!).

On Friday, Lucy will have surgery to clear out everything that's going on in those sweet ears and they will hopefully put the fourth set of tubes in. Lucy will be admitted since she is "high risk", and that is just fine with us - we actually prefer it.

Also on Friday, Henry will have a minor oral surgery, but one that is VITAL to get his PANDAS under control. We can't put it off, thus it's the same day as Lucy's important little surgery.

Because of this, the online auction for Ellie Kate's Helping Hands Fund has been put off for a bit. We WILL be doing it as we DO have a lot more money to raise for NKH families!

THANK YOU to those who have given items to the auction for the Fund in Ellie Kate's name! Your items were a huge success in Boston, at the big NKH Fundraiser, and we are so grateful! And for EVERYONE - thank YOU for your love, prayer and endless support!