When You See His Hands and Feet

2017 - A New Year is upon us, and it hardly seems possible.  I think I say that every year, but I genuinely feel that each and every time the clock strikes midnight on New Year's Eve, when Ellie Kate's "Month of Reckless Love" comes to an end.  I hate seeing it go - December, that is. 

This year, it was hard for me to jump into Ellie Kate's month, hard for me to get things organized, hard for me to put out our requests.  I think part of it is because we have been sharing with all of you for eleven years now.  That's a long time to be an "open book" and it's a long time to be vulnerable, opening yourself up and admitting your needs, weaknesses and troubles of this world.  This is, however what God has called us to do, to continue to do, sharing the ups and downs of people who love Jesus and also go through extreme difficulties.  Thank you all for your patience with us as we changed things up this year in celebration of Ellie's life, while also preparing our  hearts for adoption.  

Even though it felt chaotic to us, I know God has been in control.  We know this because we've literally sat back and watched God at work, forming relationships and working things out so that this little baby girl could come to be part of our family.  Not only that, He CLEARLY worked out the details for the outpouring of service during Ellie Kate's Month of Reckless Love, and more detailed items were given and shared than ever before!  Having a specific family to donate to, to provide for, has been such a joy for us to witness and I am just thrilled to fill you in on it all! 

Mike and I do so want to protect this sweet family which God has led us to "adopt" for Christmas and for Ellie Kate's Month of Reckless Love this year, so with that in mind we'll continue to keep their details private. However, I absolutely want you to know just how incredible and detailed your gifts have been and how deeply they have touched this particular family and ours as well!  I am THRILLED to tell you, because of YOU and your generosity, the following has been donated during this season (both new and used items): 

• New mattresses for mom and three children
• New bedding for mom and children
• New sheets for mom and children
• New mattress pads for all four, which is important bc they've dealt with bed bugs in their apartment complex before
• Furniture for their apartment, including a kitchen table, which they've never had before AND a gorgeous couch!
• Beautiful bed for Mom and eldest daughter (the kids have been sleeping on the floor)
• Floor lamp, rugs and home accessories
• New crock-pot
• Gift cards for groceries, clothing, restraunts, shoes, household items
• An entire Pantry-full of food and dry-goods was given including detergent
• Feminine products
• New, soft blankets for each member of the family (something they needed)
• Socks, gloves, coats, and hats for each member of the family
• Shoes for several members of the family
• Clothing was donated
• Warm Robe for mom
• Monetary gifts allowed bills to be paid, including electric bills, so that heat could stay on!  Basic needs could be taken care of because of one large financial gift. 
• A new laptop for the teenage daughter, which she can use now in high school and can take with her to college (they've had no computer access except when they go to the library)
• Games for the family to play together
• A camera and video camera for mom, which was her main wish.
• Pajamas for all family members, soaps and shampoos, razors, etc
• A few toys for the 8yo son and teenage toys for the girls, including make-up and nail polish
• Hair services for mom and daughter (they've never had this before)

More importantly, we have friends trying to help Mom get a job there in Shawnee and  we've contacted a few precious churches so that the family will be followed-up with on a regular basis. 

Our prayer is that the family will continue to see the Love of Christ in Action, through His Body, there in their town.
 Our desire is that Jesus' reckless love would capture their hearts and minds so greatly that their lives will never be the same after this "Reckless Love" experience!  

Equally as important to us has been the giving spirit you've shown towards our fellow NKH Families, in honor of our Daughter.  Each and everyone of the gifts we listed were purchased and given to the families!  Not only that, a precious Sunday School class further adopted one of the NKH families and provided incredible gifts and needs for this family who is dear to us.  

How in the world do we even BEGIN to thank those of you 

who've given to these two projects?  

How do you pour out your heart and express your thankfulness for 

something done in your dead Daughter's name, in her honor?  

There are SO many people to thank and many of them would be embarrassed at me mentioning their names. These blessed, giving hearts - many of whom have sacrificed in order to give in honor of Ellie Kate, in order to take care of the basic needs of people they don't and haven't even met!  What love and compassion must lie in the hearts of those who have given!  There are many of you who have wanted to give but just weren't financially able to.  You've come along beside us anyway, encouraging us and reaching out.  Most importantly, so many of you have prayed intensely, interceding on behalf of those God has laid on our hearts this season.  

When Mike and I married, our friend Laura Ramey sang "How Beautiful" at our wedding, which describes the Body of Christ being the hands and feet of Christ.  It was truly a prayer we shared because we wanted our marriage to be a picture of just that.  God has been gracious and because of our story and because of what we've been through, because of Ellie Kate, others have been inspired to love others with reckless abandon, giving and serving without expecting anything in return.  

I was reminded of this sweet song and although it most definitely IS "Old School", I ask that you take the time to listen to it.  I think the Lord will touch your heart, reminding you of what Jesus did for you while He was here on earth, fully in human form.  I hope it will remind you of the beauty of YOUR hands and YOUR feet as you continue to love without expectation.  

 "How Beautiful" - you tube version

A Prayer for You this New Year . . . 

We thank you for involvement in this past month in which we honor Ellie Kate!  We thank you for your continued encouragement as this time of year still has a deep sting and frosty bite.  We pray that the Father would bless you so richly this year, this 2017 - that you would know Jesus more deeply, that he would capture your heart in incredible ways; we pray that you would see, feel and hear him (even literally) in this New Year and that He alone would be glorified in that!  We pray too that this coming year will be full of sweet moments and memories with friends and family and also sweet memories with the Lord, as you open your heart to hear from Him.  

With Hope and Thanksgiving, 

Mike and Ryan

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Adoption - thank you for your precious words and encouragement as we continue the adoption journey with our Bowen Jane!  We have NO doubt that God has chosen her to be our daughter, esp after being born on Ellie's exact Heaven-Day.  There is just so much more involved within this process than we ever knew, more than I especially ever knew or understood and it's taken it's toll on us emotionally and physically.  We covet your prayers for a safe continuation of the adoption process and that all will fall into place quickly and easily.  As in times past, we will CHOOSE to trust that God has this under His control.  

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How Beautiful, Lyrics

Twila Paris

How beautiful the hands that served
the wine and the bread
and the sons of the earth.
How beautiful the feet that walked
the long dusty roads
and the hills to the cross.
How beautiful
how beautiful
how beautiful is the body of Christ.
How beautiful the heart that bled
that took all my sin
and bore it instead.
How beautiful the tender eyes
that chose to forgive
and never despise.
How beautiful
how beautiful
how beautiful is the body of Christ.
And as He laid down His life
we offer this sacrifice
that we will live just as he died:
willing to pay the price
willing to pay the price.
How beautiful the radient Bride
who waits for her Groom
with His light in her eyes.
How beautiful when humble hearts give
the fruit of pure lives
so that others may live.
How beautiful
how beautiful
how beautiful is the body of Christ.
How beautiful the feet that bring
the sound of good news
and the love of the King.
How beautiful the hands that serve
the wine and the bread
and the sons of the earth.
How beautiful
how beautiful
how beautiful is the body of

REDEMPTION! The Lord has done GREAT things and we are FILLED with JOY!

"Yes, the LORD has done amazing things for us! 

What joy!"

Psalm 126:3, NLT

Four years ago today (Dec 28th), we attended a service with many of you - the Celebration of Ellie Kate's Life, full of dancing, pink balloons, cookies, and even art.  We heard from precious Elders and Pastors who spoke life to all of us through God's Word.  We worshiped the Lord together, and collectively thanked God for Our Daughter's Beautiful Life - a life so short and yet a life that left a daily impact upon me as her mother, and a life who left an impact on so many of you as well.  Watch Ellie Kate's Life Celebration Here: EK Life Celebration 2012

During the time of mourning and healing these past four years; during this time of soul-searching, learning who we are in Christ, learning God’s character . . . we’ve heard so much.  

 We've heard about God's faithfulness and of His goodness.  

• We've been told that, "Everything happens for a reason" and that Ellie Kate's death wasn't purposeless or "In vain".
• We have heard of His Providence and that NOTHING can happen outside of what He allows or even causes
• We've heard that God knows our hearts and our desires and that He even places certain desires in our hearts; that He FULFILLS the desires of our hearts that will bring Him glory and those that will be for our good.
• We've been told of God's radical, reckless love for us and for our children - of His love for ALL of our children, even the little girl who suffered and died.
• We have heard that God will cause ALL of this - the good, the bad, the ugly - to work together for OUR good and for HIS glory, and that the same is true for our children.



But in all of this, what DO we believe and why?

 Do I still stand by what I've said I believe and that which

I believe God to has shown me in the past?

Has God changed? 

• I don't pretend to have tasted the worst this life has to offer.  All I know is what we've been through and what we've faced and that, has felt like a spiritual death, a mental death, an emotional death so many times over, and if it weren't for God's faithfulness and for the Hope He gives us through eternal life, we would have succumb to these trials in some way, shape or form.  

• We have felt like we've walked through the Valley of the Shadow of Death (Psalm 23:4).
• At times, we've felt abandoned by God and haven't felt His presence.  We've had to learn to choose to trust Him, trust His promises, because nothing else has made sense.  Lord, I believe!  Help my unbelief (Mark 9:24)!  
• We have truly experienced "groanings too deep for words (Romans 8:26)", and I know so many of you can relate to this deep crushing of your spirits.  
• We've wondered if God would fulfill His promises - if He would indeed cause things to work for our good, for the good of our living children (we know He's worked it for Ellie Kate's good bc she is complete and whole with Jesus).

Where we've experienced "groanings too deep for words", we are now experiencing JOY too immense of human definition.  

Where we've walked "through the Valley of the Shadow of Death", we are now skipping through the mountaintops of new life and new beginnings!  

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There are people reading this today and God has a message for some of you.

 It’s a clear message:

Sweet Momma, Our Father-God wants you to know that He IS working intimately and intricately on your behalf and on behalf of your children.  You will see His Victory soon and you will see the goodness on behalf of your children!

Struggling Daddy, Our Good, Father is taking care of ALL of your needs - emotional, mental and physical, so listen to His voice.  He's taking care of your precious children too. You will see His Victory soon and you will see the goodness on behalf of your children!  It will be better than you could ever have planned!

 

On December 23^rd 2012, Ellie Kate left this earth to spend eternity with Jesus. 

 On that day four years ago, we held Ellie for the last time and it took my breath away, as I watched them wrap that sweet body in a white sheet, carrying Ellie Kate out to a van and driving her away from us forever. 

On December 23^rd, 2016, Bowen Jane McLaughlin was born into our family through adoption.  This past Friday, God took my breath away when I witnessed our fifth child being born; when the doctor wrapped Bowen Jane in a white blanket of sorts, and handed her to me to hold forever.  On Christmas Morning, we welcomed Bowen into our home.

Who, but God could make this happen in such an extraordinarily exquisite way?!  Better than we could ever dream up or ever begin to hope. 

Without yet going into details, I can tell you that we are going through a private attorney, who is a precious Believer and friend.  Through God's goodness, we were connected to the birth mom through one of Ellie Kate's former home health nurses.  NO doubt, Ellie Kate has played a big role in all of this and we wouldn't have our Bowen Jane without our eldest daughter, of that we are sure.

This most certainly came to us, out of nowhere, although we had publically expressed our desire for adopting and had shared the things God so fiercely laid on our hearts, burning it even brighter starting December 18th, 2015, when He led me to post about it on FB.  

The process has involved friends and strangers, Believers and those who do not know the Lord yet personally.  We’ve become close to our Birth Mom and to her little family.  Mike and I rest, knowing we have literally stood back and watched God at work.  We haven’t pushed or prodded or even sought things out.  We’ve sought godly counsel from our Home Church, from Dear Friends, from other parents who’ve gone through adoption, and from parents who’ve adopted after burying a child with special needs.  God has so literally surrounded us with a great cloud of fully-knowledgeable people who’ve spoken truth into our lives during these last many months.

  

 

 

REDEEM: to buy back, repurchase; to get or win back. 
 To repair or restore.

Through these four short years, moments of which have seemed agonizingly long, God has shown Himself to each of us in real ways, and the greatest way He has done that is through the birth of Miss Bowen Jane McLaughlin, this perfect baby girl who was born on Ellie Kate's Fourth Heaven Day, December 23th.  

She is Our Daughter, whom God has called us to adopt,
Our Daughter whom God has so clearly given to us! 

While so much of Our Journey remains a mystery, with confidence,

I CAN tell you the following . . . 

• For the Believer, God REDEEMS that which has been lost. God redeems us as humans, giving us eternal life with Him and abundant life here on earth.  God REDEEMS the broken things - the things we break on our own, because of our sin.  He redeems the things stolen by this broken, evil world

• God IS GOOD, even when it doesn't feel like it, ESP when it doesn't feel like it or when you can't see it.
• God IS working it all for your good, for the good of your children, for the good of ALL who love Him.  You can trust Him, no matter what, even if you must CHOOSE to trust. 
• God doesn't think any less or any different of you when you question Him or when you choose to trust (when you don't feel like trusting), or even when you or can't feel Him.  This doesn't make you any less of a Believer.
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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   Your Father loves you the same, no matter what you say or what you do!  There is NOTHING that can change His amount of love for you nor the giddy, passionate way He feels about you as His Child! 
• God listens to the desires of your heart, Friend.  Oftentimes, He places those desires IN your heart so he knows them before you do!  God WILL fulfill those beautiful desires, the ones which seem so impossible, the ones you know that the Father-God gave to you.

 You just wait and see, Friends - if He's done it for us, He will do it for you.  REDEMPTION.  He WILL redeem what you are facing, what you've been through and what you will soon go through.  He WILL turn mourning into dancing, just as He promises for us as Believers.  Don't lose hope.  CHOOSE to believe Him, even when you don't feel like it

(esp when you don't feel like it), Mark 9:24.  

Conner, Meeting Ellie Kate for the first time - Dec 5, 2005

Bowen Jane, Going Home - December 25, 2016

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Our hearts are overflowing with humbleness, with gratitude,

with thankfulness as we look in awe at God's Providence. 

Will we still hurt?  Absolutely, and I imagine we will hurt even more deeply than we've experienced thus far, as reality sets in and we come to know that Ellie Kate won't get to love on or play with Bowen here on earth.  Bowen Jane the only sibling who won't have a chance to remember EK and wasn't able to see her in her earthly body like the others.  I find myself accidently calling Lucy, "Ellie Kate" during these last days bc it seems so similar to what we've already faced.  Ellie was just this size, just the same, when we brought Lucy home.  There will be many things that will be difficult in the days to come, and we aren't ignoring that.

We KNOW the heartache will continue and we know that Satan will come to steal our joy and our hope.  We KNOW too though, now more than EVER before,

how FAITHFUL AND TRUE Our God is!

We thank you for your continued prayers over this month of December - a month so full of heartache and now joy, as well.  We thank you too for your many texts, calls, emails, and messages as you've encouraged us with your words during Ellie Kate's Month of Reckless Love. 
 Thank you for saying her name, “Ellie Kate”.  
Thank you for sharing her story. 
 Thank you for recklessly loving, serving and giving to those around you!  

Miss Ellie Kate McLaughlin

If you ever have doubted God's existence, look upon Our Story.  HE.IS.REAL. He is active and alive; He is good Father.  Soon, you will be here in our position, telling others about His goodness and the fulfillment of His promises!

Ellie Kate, Dec 2005

Bowen Jane, Dec 2016

  

We are proof though, that God WILL, CAN and DOES so gladly take the Broken and make it into something more beautiful than anything ANYONE in the world could ever, possibly imagine!!!

"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, 21to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen", Ephesians 3:20-21

 With Our Love and with Thanksgiving beyond Description,

Mike, Ryan, Conner, Henry,
Lucy Belle, Bowen Jane (and Ellie Kate from Heaven)!

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Many sweet friends have asked about end-of-year giving, so with that in mind, we share the following information (simply click on the links below):

• NKH Crusaders - Supporting Research - funds donated go solely toward NKH research at the University of Colorado and Denver Children's Hospital, or the research efforts at Notre Dame University, and/or the new research efforts at Boston Children's Hospital

• OKC Hope Link - the 501c3 God led us to start in 2007,  ministering to families whose children suffer from rare, serious and undiagnosed disorders / outreach to families who have lost children due to disease or illness
• McLaughlin Family Medical Fund - through Helping Hands Ministries, a 501c3 which pays medical bills directly or reinmburses via medical receipt (seen under 'Ellie Kate Memorial Fund').